Somewhere in the unwritten, unspoken but universally known guide to being a man is the axiom that a man is nothing if he’s not able. Man’s reluctance to ask for help has contributed to the discovery of an array of ingenious solutions to everyday problems. When rubbing some dirt on it, walking it off, and cursing loudly fail to fix it, try some of these tips before admitting defeat.
1. Whiskey for a sore throat
Why is it that we don’t realize our house is void of all medical supplies until we’re in need of some? If you’re suffering from a sore throat a good home remedy is mixing warm water (to clean and open pores), whiskey (to sterilize), and honey (to coat and soothe). Gargle, sip, do whatever you find the most relieving. Chug it if you think drunk, hydrated, and full of honey sounds like fun.
2. Ran into poison ivy? Make a drink.
Chances are you’ve got some alcohol around the house, which can come in handy when dealing with poison ivy. It is important to stop the oils from poison ivy from penetrating the skin and then spreading. Strong alcohol is effective at both washing away the oils and keeping the pores closed, preventing absorption. Warm water can open pores and soap can spread the oils around, so rinse it with vodka and then make yourself a martini to help take your mind off of the overwhelming urge to itch.
3. Sunburn solution
You may have thought you looked manly by opting out of suntan lotion at the beach, but now you look less manly and more like Clifford the big red idiot. Aloe vera is helpful to an extent but try using black tea leaves instead. Soak tea bags in water, and when they are entirely saturated, lightly press the bags against your skin. You should be back outside chasing the pool honnies in no time.
4. Use gasoline instead of soap
Whenever domestic chores require messy materials the worst part is the cleanup, especially cleaning your own hands. Grab some gasoline from the garage, which acts as a thinning agent, and a Brillo pad to scrub away paint, tar, oil, and other hard to remove substances.
5. Fix squeaky floors with talcum powder
If you’ve got wood floors that constantly squeak, spread talcum powder in the cracks then sweep away the excess. Your floors will stop squeaking and you can start sneaking.
6. Safely remove a light bulb
This one is actually two tips in one. If you’ve got a lightbulb that just refuses to twist out, wrap it in duct tape on both sides so that you have handles with the excess tape that hangs off. Not only does this give you added leverage, but it puts less pressure on the bulb. If the bulb is already broken with sharp glass sticking out of it, use a potato to get it out. Seriously! cut a potato in half and then shove the flat half over the glass, but make sure to unplug the lamp as potatoes are able to conduct electricity.
7. Use rice as a sponge
If not properly sealed, containers holding powdery or grainy substances can let in moisture that causes the substance to clump and harden. Mix plain white rice into salt, brown sugar, etc. to prevent this with no effect on the taste.
8. Soap your screws
If you’re having a hard time driving screws into wood, try rubbing the screws on a bar of soap first. The soap acts as a lubricant and lets the screws pass through the hardest of wood with ease.
9. Submerge an inner tube to find the hole
When a deflated bike tube is not as obvious as a big nail sticking out of your tire, it can be tricky to find a small puncture. Mark a spot on the tire and the tube so that you can match them up again later. Remove the tube and pump it up again, then immediately submerge it in water. If you can’t see air bubbles yet, try systematically working your way around the tube stretching the rubber as you go. Once you’ve found the hole in the tube, match that spot up with where it was in the tire and you should be able to find the little bugger that got you - most likely it’ll be a piece of glass or thorn.
10. Never buy a phone charger again
With the amount most of us rely on our phones nowadays it’s almost as if a piece of you dies when your phone does. So, when you lose your charger and feel like a man on death row, it’s important that you find a replacement power source soon. Instead of heading to the store and forking over another fifteen bucks, just go to a hotel. With the amount of people that cycle through, hotels are bound to have tons of forgotten chargers. It’s up to you whether you ask politely for a lost one or pretend it was yours all along.
11. Fix a screw hole with a golf tee
A screw can sometimes cause a big unsightly hole to be left in wood furniture when it is removed. To fix it, push a golf tee with a little bit of wood glue on it into the hole then cut the tee where it meets the wood. Sand it until the surfaces are flush, and then stain it to match. The fix will be nearly unnoticeable.
12. Reducing acne is as easy as a clean towel
People who deal with acne are constantly trying new things to help subdue it. One thing they rarely realize is a problem is their pillow. Even at night we sweat and our skin secretes oils. Think about how infrequently you change your pillowcase compared to other material that touches your skin. Try wrapping your pillowcase with a clean towel that you plan on using the next day and you should see positive results within days.
13. Remove a splinter with glue
Splinters are the worst. Sometimes you’re able to pull it out with tweezers or grit your teeth and carve it out with a knife, but not always. When it’s rooted in there deep, put a generous dab of superglue over it then cover it with a band-aid. Once it’s totally dry, peel off the band-aid and glue and the splinter should come with it. If that doesn’t work you might just have to submit to losing the finger all together.
14. Your own saliva can remove your own blood
This is true in small amounts. For instance, a few drops of blood on your shirt from a split lip can come out by using saliva and a rag. If, on the other hand, you’re standing in a pool of blood that may or may not be all yours, spitting on it is only gonna add more DNA for forensics to find. In that case, you better hope you’ve got the Wolf’s phone number on speed dial.
15. Warm beer woes?
You’re having a cookout and didn’t remember to put the beer in the cooler until the first guest shows up and asks for a cold one? No worries. Cover the beers in the cooler completely in ice, and then add salt to the ice. The reaction of the mixture can chill a beer in 3-5 minutes
16. Keep warm at night with clean clothes
Whether you’re camping under the stars in autumn or your house is drafty in the winter, there’s one trick guaranteed to help keep you warmer while you sleep. Clean clothes. Your clothes soak up sweat and other oily skin secretions when you wear them and by the end of the day they are slightly moist and no longer able to whisk away sweat. So, don’t wear the undershirt you wore all day to bed and wash those pajamas that haven’t seen the laundry room in a fortnight and you should stay snug and warm.
17. Keep your tools rust free with chalk
A simple way to keep rust of your tools is by keeping blackboard chalk in your toolbox. It will help the same way rice helps in salt. The dust absorbs any moisture that gets in and causes rust on metal tools. Plus, you’ll always have it in case someone challenges you to an impromptu game of hopscotch.
18. Bananas are the cure to hangovers
It’s not called alcoholism until after college, right? This flawed reasoning is why most college students are in the constant search for the best hangover cure. It’s fairly common knowledge that your hangover is caused by dehydration. While chugging water the morning after will help you regain some of what you lost, it’s not going to replace everything. Dehydration also causes a potassium deficiency, and the best way in nature to replace potassium is to eat bananas. So grab a bundle while you trudge to Starbucks for your caffeine fix, and besides looking like Donkey Kong after a bender, you’ll be alright.
19. Cure Dandruff with Vinegar and Apple Juice
An equal parts concoction of vinegar and apple juice can cure dandruff better than many expensive dandruff shampoos. The vinegar does most of the work by cleaning and making the skin healthy again. The apple juice offers some vitamins but mostly works to cut the potency of the pure vinegar. Leave the mixture in your hair and when it dries the vinegar smell will dissipate and you will be left with a healthy flake-free scalp.
20. Saline to the nose to subdue allergies
Saline, used as artificial tears for contact wearers, can help relieve swelling in the nasal cavity caused by allergies. The salt mixture washes away allergens and cleans the inside of your sinuses. Try doing this in the privacy of a bathroom or people will think you’re slightly insane, especially if you look as happy about it as the lady in the above picture.
There’s no dispute that since his days at SNL to his roles as a movie frontman, Will Ferrell has been exceedingly good at making us laugh. His characters, always flirting with the line between the ridiculous and the obscene, have all shared one common trait, however. They’ve taught us how to be a man. (Excluding his hilarious foray into drag for Janet Reno’s Dance Party) So, here are eight Will Ferrell characters that taught the most about being a man.
#1 Ricky Bobby
So often people fail because they’re insecure and think they’re not good enough to succeed. It usually is not true, but it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Well your momma didn’t raise no sissy! Have the mentality of “I’m the best there is. Plain and simple. I wake up in the morning and piss excellence.” True, arrogance could cause you to run headfirst into a wall, but find the perfect balance of confidence and become the champion you know you are. First or last, baby!!!
#2 Gene Frenkel
Not everyone can be the frontman, but that doesn’t diminish your importance. If you’ve got a niche and you’re good at it then own that skill, and people will notice. Be proud of your abilities, whatever they are, and make them a valuable asset. Don’t ask if the group if it could use any more cowbell, be so good that they get a fever and the only cure will be more cowbell!
#3 Harry Caray
The term “there are no dumb questions” is just, well…dumb. But, if you don’t know something, sometimes you just have to ask a dumb question to find out. Your temporary embarrassment will be worth added intelligence. How else are you going to find out the important information about people without asking things like “If you were a hot dog, and you were starving, would you eat yourself?”
#4 Chazz Reinhold
If you’ve got dynamite and you happen to be fishing, use it! There’s no point making things more difficult than they should be. Try to avoid the morally questionable like literally fishing with dynamite or seducing women at funerals (even though grief is nature’s most powerful aphrodisiac). The point is to find an edge to take advantage of. Most people think “by the book” is the only way to go about things, but those people will forever run with the pack. Think outside the box and write your own book.
#5 Craig Buchanan
Be enthusiastic. Be cheerful. Be like the band geek at prom; just happy to be invited. The world’s got enough negative people and enough whiners. Lift people up and cheer them on. It doesn’t matter if they are competing for a world championship or a high school regional chess tournament, they will appreciate the encouragement. Your life is as exciting and positive as you make it. Make it a good one.
The world is a lonely place when you’ve got no one to share it with. Find someone who shares your interests in watching cops, collecting retro-nudie mags, and doing karate in the garage. It makes Shark Week even more enjoyable when you’re watching it with your bestie. Plus, you’ve always got someone to watch your back so you’ll never again end up with a belly full of white dog crap.
#7 Ron Burgundy
That is all you need to know as a man. Follow the other seven lessons you learned and then grow a mustache. People respect and put an exorbitant amount of trust in a man who can grow luscious lady tickler. The thicker the better. Now that you know the tricks, it’s time to start down the path of manhood that Will Ferrell has paved for us all. From all of us here at DragNSYNC, you stay classy.
Even the best mess up sometimes. Check out this hilarious montage of Will Ferrell Bloopers!
Tarantino’s modern gangster noir turns 18 this year. We all know the soundtrack and the best quotes by heart, but how can these prizefighters, gangsters and other unique characters make you a better leader? Let’s take a few lessons from these guys.
Jules Winnfield – Know when to get out of a bad situation. In the movie, Jules is nearly gunned down in an ambush by a guy wielding a very large hand cannon. Remarkably, (Jules believes ‘miraculously’) he’s not hit and quickly dispatches his attacker. At that precise moment, he decides to abandon his life of crime, no matter what the financial toll will be.
Not everyone gets a moment of clarity like Jules had, but many people don’t take a moment to step back and look at their situation objectively. Are you in a job, relationship or other situation that’s not where you want to be? It might pay off to take a bold step, even if you’re scared to do so. The greatest failure is sometimes the failure to try.
Vincent Vega – Be willing to improvise and reach out to your network to help you out of a jam. When Vincent’s chaperoning of Mia Wallace takes a turn for the worse, he has to rely on his friend the entrepreneur to save her life (and his). Knowing nowhere else to turn, he goes to the one person he knows who can bring the boss’s wife back to consciousness.
Facebook and Twitter are great tools for updating the world on every facet of your personal life, but do you use them to stay connected with people who can help you out professionally? Don’t forget to reciprocate - offer your own expertise or assistance when you can. It’s great to be owed a favor and helping people out just feels good. Don’t neglect a chance to take it offline and buy someone a coffee, lunch or a drink.
Marcellus Wallace – Keep it cool, and stay focused. It’s tough being a crime boss, but Mr. Wallace makes it look pretty easy. Even when everyone around him is panicking, he’s staying level-headed, speaking in a calm tone of voice, and clearly passing directives to the people he manages.
We’ve all been in a situation where someone’s freaking out, or everyone’s shouting their ideas over everyone else. Hasty decisions can get people in serious personal and professional trouble. Nobody ever learned anything with their mouth open, so listen more and think more than the next guy. You’re all on the same team, and you can get to the goal together.
Butch Coolidge – When you see your opportunity, take it. After a lifetime of being knocked around literally and figuratively, Butch takes a big risk that, if it pays off, will ensure his safety and security for a long long time.
Most of us choose to make our living outside of a boxing ring, so it’s not as clear when our “title fight” will be. But the adrenaline you get before a big interview, presentation or even a date is the same feeling that Manny gets right before he heads down that tunnel. Leave it all out there and give every opportunity your best effort. Regret’s a pain worse than a body shot. Oh yeah, and double check your suitcase when you’re packing.
“Pumpkin” – Know when you’re beaten. When “Pumpkin” finds himself looking down the barrel of Jules’ 9mm in the diner, his plan to rob the joint has been completely destroyed. Rather than risk his life and that of his “Honey Bunny,” he accepts defeat humbly and moves on without any blood being spilled.
Nobody wins ‘em all. You have to learn to lose with dignity and move on to your next challenge. Don’t dwell on losses, but make sure you learn from them.
The Wolf – Be a clutch guy that people can count on. When the clock is ticking and a big package needs to be delivered in a timely fashion, the gang is lost until they get in touch with the Wolf.
We’ve covered what it means to be a clutch guy before, but the best thing about the Wolf is the confidence he inspires in those around him (“You’re sending the Wolf? That’s all you had to say!!”).
He makes clear, strong choices and simple plans. He thinks as fast as he drives, and he pays attention to every detail. The guy who’s connected, who has a plan, and who can organize people and motivate them will always win the day.
Zed and Maynard – Try not to be like either of these guys in any way.
Got any more? Hit us up in the comments.
We recently ran a post featuring the Ultimate Gentleman’s den. The man cave is a sacred place and one that should be open only to the worthy. A gentleman values privacy and knows to keep his best secrets hidden to prying eyes. Check out these secret passageways few have seen.
Every Gentleman needs his living space. Whether you’re showing off your collection, entertaining guests, or simply unwinding with a glass of scotch, the den is essential. Take a look at these dream “Man Caves”.